UNIT 1: THE LEARNER SECTION 2: “FULL-POT” – THE ROLE OF SELF-ESTEEM UNIT GOAL: Examine and value the role of self-esteem for individualism. CULMINATING OBJECTIVE: Explore children’s literature for self-concept. Create and present a media form (puppet show, “big book”) for an elementary audience. LESSONS 1.2A Is Your Pot “Es-teeming?” Virginia Satir 1.2B Celebration of Self Through Song 1.2C Will You Accept the Invitation? Dr. William Purkey 1.2D Now We’re Cooking: Recipes for Successful Groups 1.2E Group Dynamics: Real Characters in a Budget Crunch 1.2F Where the Wild Things Are: A Media Specialist Tells All 1.2G Fairy Tales of Color 1.2H From Stories to Puppet Theaters 1.2I Big Books for Little Folks 1.2J My “Pot” Runneth Over: Essay Exam on Self-Esteem 1.2A IS YOUR POT “ES-TEEMING?” Objective Define the concept of self-esteem and evaluate the factors which impact one's self-worth. Bloom’s Taxonomy Framework Knowledge Dimension Remember Understand Apply Analyze Evaluate Create Factual 2 2 2 2 Conceptual 1 2 3 Procedural 3 Metacognitive 1 2 3 2,3 Essential Question What is self-esteem and what factors impact one's self-worth? Lesson Plan 1. Prior to having the students read "The Pot Nobody Watches," have the students consider: Where would you go for self-worth? Explain that they will discuss an article that answers the question. 2. Upon completion of the reading, use the follow-up questions on the student handout titled "Points about Pot." These questions can be used for an in-class discussion or as a homework assignment. 3. As an additional activity, have students write on small strips of paper one positive comment about each person in the class. Post the "Filling Your Pot" illustrations. Students will walk around the room, taping or gluing the compliments in the appropriate pots, creating a "full-pot" for everyone in the class. Other kinds of student "pots" can be decorated (jars, cans, cups, or boxes) in which classmates place their written compliments. Students may choose to personalize their pots in an artistic fashion, laminating their names on the pots, or creating collages symbolic of their lives. 4. Discuss "A Word Is Worth a Thousand Pictures" with students. Outline the verbs from each section, having students respond to the connotative and denotative meanings (ex. "ignore"). Student Materials/Resources Paper, pencils, glue, tape Handout- "Self-Worth: The Pot Nobody Watches" Handout- "Points about Pot" Handout- "Filling Your Pot" Teacher Materials/Resources Information Sheet- "A Word Is Worth a Thousand Pictures" Lesson Extensions/Assessments 1. Students may write a journal entry in which they react to the comments placed in their pots. 2. Students may write a reflection or create illustrations demonstrating experiences they have had with positive and negative behaviors and adult role models. * Teacher Tip: Have students bring in and decorate boxes to use in the classroom throughout the course. You may have students select secret pals or periodically repeat the positive statement activity (holidays, spirit week, etc.). 1.2A SELF-WORTH: THE POT NOBODY WATCHES: Student Handout When I was a little girl, I lived on a farm in Wisconsin. On our back porch was a huge black iron pot, which had lovely rounded sides and stood on three legs. My mother made her own soap so, for part of the year, the pot was filled with soap. When threshing crews came through in the summer, we filled the pot with stew. At other times, my father used it to store manure for my mother’s flowerbeds. We all came to call it the “3-S pot.” Whenever we wanted to use the pot, we were faced with two questions: What is the pot now full of, and how full is it? Long afterward, when people would tell me of their feelings of self-worth – whether they felt full or empty, dirty, or even “cracked” – I would think of that old pot. One day several years ago, a family was sitting in my office and its members were trying to explain to one another how they felt about themselves. I remember the black pot and told them the story. Soon the members of the family were talking about their own individual “pots” whether they contained feelings of worth or of guilt, shame, or uselessness. So, when I say “pot,” I mean self-worth or self-esteem. I am convinced that the crucial factor in what happens both inside people and between people is the picture of the individual worth that each person carries around with him – his pot. Integrity, honesty, responsibility, compassion, love – all flow easily from the people whose pot is high. They feel that they matter, that the world is a better place because they are here. They have faith in their own competence. They are able to ask others for help, but they believe they can make their own decisions and are their own best resource. Appreciating their own worth, they are ready to see and respect the worth of others. They radiate trust and hope. They don’t have rules against anything they feel. They accept all of themselves as human. Other people, however, spend most of their lives in a low-pot condition. Because they feel they have little worth, they expect to be cheated, stepped on, deprecated by others. Expecting the worst, they invite it and usually get it. To defend themselves, they hide behind a wall of distrust and sink into the terrible human state of loneliness and isolation. Thus separated from other people, they become apathetic, indifferent toward themselves and those around them. It is hard for them to see, hear, or think clearly and, therefore, they are more prone to step on and deprecate others. I am convinced that there are no genes to carry the feeling of worth. It is learned. And the family is where it is learned. You learned to feel high pot or low pot in the family your parents created. Your children will learn it in your family. An infant coming into the world has no past, no experience in handling himself, no scale on which to judge his own worth. He must rely on the experiences he has with the people around him and the messages they give him about his worth as a person. For the first four or five years the family forms the child’s pot most exclusively. After he starts schools, other influences come into play, but the family remains important throughout his adolescence. Outside forces tend to reinforce the feelings of worth or worthlessness that he has learned at home: the high-pot child can weather many failures in school or among peers; the low-pot child can experience many successes yet feel a gnawing doubt about his own value. Every word, facial expression, gesture, or action on the part of the parent gives the child some message about his worth. It is sad that so many parents don’t realize the effect these messages have on a child and often don’t even realize what messages they are sending. A mother may accept the bouquet clutched in her three-year-old’s hand and say, “Where did you pick these?” – her voice and smile implying “How sweet of you to bring me these! Where do such lovely flowers grow?” This message would strengthen the child’s feelings of worth. Or she might say, “How pretty!” but add, “Did you pick these in Mrs. Randall’s garden?” – implying that the child was bad to steal them. This message would make them feel wicked and worthless. Or she might say, “How pretty! Where did you pick them?” but wear a worried, accusing expression that added, “Did you steal them from Mrs. Randall’s garden?” In this case, she is building a low pot but probably does not realize it. Feelings of worth can only flourish in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere found in a nurturing family. It is no accident that the children of these families usually feel good about themselves, or that the children of troubled families so often feel worthless growing up as they must amid “crooked” communication, inflexible rules, criticism of their differentness, and punishment for their mistakes. Happy, it is possible to raise everyone’s pot, no matter what his or her age. Since the feeling of worth has been learned, it can be unlearned, and something new can be learned in its place. The possibility for this learning lasts from birth to death, so it is never too late. At any point in a person’s life, he can begin to feel better about himself. Source: Peoplemaking (1972) by Virginia Satir 1.2A POINTS ABOUT POT: Student Handout 1. React to Satir’s statement: “I am convinced that the crucial factor in what happens both inside people and between people is the picture of individual worth that each person carries around with him in his pot.” 2. List ten adjectives that describe “low pot.” 3. Explain how Satir describes the development of self-esteem. 4. What role do nonverbal cues play in the development of self-esteem? 5. Write your “Declaration of Self-Esteem” beginning with “I am me” and ending with “I am me, and I am okay.” 1.2A FILLING YOUR POT: Student Handout STUDENT’S NAME __________________________________________________________ 1.2A A WORD IS WORTH A THOUSAND PICTURES: Teacher Resource Words … and periods of silence … play a major role in the development of self-concept. The influence is either positive or negative. We know the effects of screaming and ridiculing, of smiling and using gentle words; but what are the subtle effects of our verbal behaviors on the development of self-esteem? NEGATIVE BEHAVIORS 1. Adults ignore children, sending the message that they have no interest in their activities. 2. Adults interrupt children who are speaking to them as well as children who are speaking to each other. 3. Adults discourage children from expressing themselves. (e.g., “Tell me later. Not now, I’m busy.”) 4. Adults are sarcastic when speaking with children. (e.g., “Most high school students already know this material.”) 5. Adults pay superficial attention to what children have to say. (e.g., “Stop looking at your watch and listen to me.”) 6. Adults are judgmental when dealing with children and their issues. (e.g., “You should try as hard as your sister.”) 7. Adults put down children’s interests. (e.g., “I’m sick of hearing how much you enjoyed that concert.”) 8. Adults give orders. (e.g., “Come here.” “Go there.”) POSITIVE BEHAVIORS 1. Adults send messages that tell children they value what they say. (e.g., “It sounds as though you are really happy with the drawing that you just did.”) 2. Adults tell children that they enjoy being with them. (e.g., “I haven’t laughed this hard in ages.”) 3. Adults use the child’s interests as the basis for conversation. (e.g., “I’ve seen you jump rope at recess. What are some of the chants that you use?”) 4. Adults take advantage of the “teachable moment.” (e.g., “I know you’re feeling sad about your cat dying. Let’s talk about it.”) 5. Adults avoid making judgmental comments to children. (e.g., “I can see that you are feeling really angry right now. Tell me what’s important to you in the story you wrote.”) 6. Adults accept the invitation from children. (e.g., “Let’s do it now! It sounds like fun!”) 1.2B CELEBRATION OF SELF THROUGH SONG Objective Demonstrate an understanding of the affects of music and lyrics on self-concept, both individually and that of others. Bloom’s Taxonomy Framework Knowledge Dimension Remember Understand Apply Analyze Evaluate Create Factual 2 3 Conceptual 2 3 2 Procedural Metacognitive 3 Essential Question How does music, and especially lyrics, reflect and define a person’s self-concept? Lesson Plan 1. Explain that you are going to play some songs. We have included the words to “Greatest Love of All” and “Flowers Are Red.” Other songs you may want to use are “R-E-S-P-E-C-T,” “I Believe I Can Fly,” and “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother.” Invite students to bring in their own music selections. 2. As students listen to the songs, have them record words that come to mind. 3. After listening to the songs, discuss these questions: What words and feelings seem to occur most often as you recorded your thoughts while listening? What do these songs say about the development of self-concept? Based on these songs, what advice would you give to teachers about self-concept? Student Materials/Resources Handout- “Greatest Love of All” lyrics Handout- “Flowers Are Red” lyrics Teacher Materials/Resources Recordings/CDs of “Greatest Love of All” and “Flowers are Red” Lesson Extensions/Assessments 1. Students may pretend to be the next teacher of the child who paints his flowers red. They can write a letter to this child to affirm his values and opinions. 2. Students may write their own poems as a response to one of the songs. 3. Students may place in their portfolios the words to another song that addresses self-concept and include an explanation or interpretation of the lyrics. 1.2B GREATEST LOVE OF ALL: Student Handout I believe the children are our are future Teach them well and let them lead the way Show them all the beauty they possess inside Give them a sense of pride to make it easier Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be Everybody’s searching for a hero People need someone to look up to I never found anyone to fulfill my needs A lonely place to be So I learned to depend on me [Chorus:] I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows If I fail, if I succeed At least I live as I believe No matter what they take from me They can't take away my dignity Because the greatest love of all Is happening to me I found the greatest love of all Inside of me The greatest love of all Is easy to achieve Learning to love yourself It is the greatest love of all I believe the children are our future Teach them well and let them lead the way Show them all the beauty they possess inside Give them a sense of pride to make it easier Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be [Chorus] And if by chance, that special place That you've been dreaming of Leads you to a lonely place Find your strength in love Whitney Houston, Arista Records 1985 1.2B FLOWERS ARE RED: Student Handout The little boy went first day of school. He got some crayons and started to draw. He put colors all over the paper for colors was what he saw. And the teacher said, “What you doin' young man?” “I'm paintin' flowers,” he said. She said, “It's not the time for art young man, And anyway flowers are green and red. There's a time for everything young man And a way it should be done. You've got to show concern for everyone else For you're not the only one.” And she said, “Flowers are red young man. Green leaves are green. There's no need to see flowers any other way than the way they always have been seen. But the little boy said … “There are so many colors in the rainbow, So many colors in the morning sun, So many colors in the flower and I see every one.” Well the teacher said, “You're sassy. There's ways that things should be, And you'll paint flowers the way they are, so repeat after me …” And she said, “Flowers are red, young man; Green leaves are green. There's no need to see flowers any other way than the way they always have been seen.” But the little boy said, “There are so many colors in the rainbow, So many colors in the morning sun, so many colors in the flower, and I see every one.” The teacher put him in a corner. She said, “It's for your own good. And you won't come out 'til you get it right, and respond like you should.” Well, finally he got lonely. Frightened thoughts filled his head, And he went up to the teacher, and this is what he said … “Flowers are red, green leaves are green. There's no need to see flowers any other way than the way they always have been seen.” Time went by like it always does, and they moved to another town, And the little boy went to another school, and this is what he found. The teacher there was smilin'. She said, “Painting should be fun And there are so many colors in a flower, so let's use every one.” But that little boy painted flowers in neat rows of green and red. And when the teacher asked him why, this is what he said … And he said, “Flowers are red, green leaves are green There's no need to see flowers any other way Than the way they always have been seen.” 1.2C WILL YOU ACCEPT THE INVITATION? Objective Explore self-concept theory and the role of inviting and disinviting schools. Bloom’s Taxonomy Framework Knowledge Dimension Remember Understand Apply Analyze Evaluate Create Factual 3 4 3,4 Conceptual 4 3,4 Procedural 4 4 3,4 Metacognitive 2 4 1,2 1 3,4 Essential Question What differences exist between inviting and disinviting schools and how does each contribute to self-concept? Lesson Plan 1. Think about the following situations: When your history teacher asks you a question and you give an incorrect response, his reply is, "Any third grader would know that answer." When your English teacher reads your paper, she replies, “Your writing has the power of some of Maya Angelou’s works.” When your math teacher calls on you in December, he has to look at the roll book to get your name. 2. Discuss the common elements of the three situations. Discuss "An Overview of Self-Concept Theory." 3. Divide the class into small groups and have them read "Seven Gifts for Teachers That Will Last a Lifetime." Discuss the information with students. Have the students make a list on the board of inviting and disinviting practices they've seen in their school Student Materials/Resources Handout- "An Overview of Self-Concept Theory" Handout- "Seven Gifts for Teachers That Will Last a Lifetime" Teacher Materials/Resources White board, dry erase markers Lesson Extensions/Assessments 1. Students may design their own invitations. For example, they can write an invitation to the shyest boy in the school, to someone having difficulty with his parents, or to a new student. The invitation should be designed so that the person feels he is getting an offer he would find difficult to refuse. 2. Students may write a reflection paper, stating whether or not their high school is inviting to minority students, disabled students, or foreign students.