Wherever you are We're there for you - Eluna Network (PDF)

National Bereavement Resource Guide Wherever you are We’re there for you  National Bereavement Resource Guide An extensive guide to aid those in need Wherever you are. We are there for you. National Bereavement Resource Guide Sponsored by New York Life and Eluna Wherever children and their families are grieving, and wherever they are in the grieving process, we are here to help. New York Life is proud to partner with Eluna to provide the enclosed compilation of state and local resources—camps and grief organizations organized by state, plus books and websites for children and their families experiencing loss. The New York Life Foundation (www.newyorklifefoundation.org) has long been focused on serving children in need. In 2008, the Foundation expanded that focus to include an initiative to help children deal with the loss of a parent, caregiver or sibling and to help parents deal with the emotional turmoil that results from the death of a close family member. We believe this comprehensive guide will provide the necessary resources and directory of services to help support grieving families in communities across the country. In addition, we’ve developed a bereavement website that can help—www.AChildinGrief.com. Eluna (elunanetwork.org) is a public, 501(c)(3) non-profit with a mission to support children and families impacted by grief or addiction. Founded in 2000 in Seattle by former MLB pitcher Jamie Moyer and child advocate Karen Phelps Moyer, Eluna was originally called The Moyer Foundation and launched a series of programs supporting thousands of children and families annually at no cost to them. Camp Erin® is the largest national network of grief programs for bereaved children and teens, Camp Mariposa® is a national addiction prevention and mentoring program for youth impacted by a family member's substance use disorder, and the Eluna Resource Center offers online tools, local referrals and personalized phone and email support for families experiencing grief, addiction and other related issues.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Teen Books A Decembered Grief: Living with Loss While Others Are Celebrating Harold Ivan Smith Suffering the loss of a loved one at any time of the year is difficult; yet during the holidays or special occasions, those grieving experience a more intense sense of loss. The world is moving forward and celebrating life and all its blessings; yet for grievers, darkness pervades the holiday. A Grief Like No Other: Surviving the Violent Death of Someone You Love Kathleen O’Hara In response to the brutal murder of her son, therapist O’Hara developed this seven- stage process to help others in making the journey to healing. After You Lose Someone You Love Amy, Allie, and David Dennison This journal was written by three ordinary children whose lives were forever changed when one night their father died unexpectedly and suddenly. Of course, the world of this family fell apart. From these journal entries and drawings, one learns they rewove their lives until they came to realize they were moving forward on a journey called grief. All Three Stooges Erica S. Perl This book is about Dash and Noah - two goofy, comedy-obsessed seventh grade boys – and the ripple effect of Dash’s dad’s suicide on their friendship. The author takes us along with Noah on his journey, tackling sensitive issues surrounding the death of a loved one—both from the perspective of supporting someone who is grieving, and as someone who is grieving. Anne and the Sand Dobbies John Coburn This is a story of a young boy and how he and his family came to terms with the death of their young sister. As Much Time As It Takes: A Guide for the Bereaved, Their Family, and Friends Martin J. Keogh Written from the viewpoint of a grieving person, As Much Time As It Takes helps us sensitively navigate those awkward, yet important, moments of comforting those mourning the loss of a loved one. This unique book comforts the bereaved by articulating the overwhelming wave of emotions and supports the “support team” by helping them to avoid the clichés and find the right words at the right time. Be Not Afraid: Overcoming the Fear of Death Johann Arnold Arnold shows how suffering can be given meaning in Be Not Afraid. He offers the assurance that even today, in our culture of isolation and death, there is such a thing as hope. Bereaved Children and Teens Earl A. Grollman Bringing together 14 experts from across the United States and Canada, Bereaved Children and Teens is a comprehensive guide to helping children and adolescents cope with the emotional, religious, social, and physical consequences of a loved one’s death. Beyond the Ridge Paul Goble Paul Goble’s Beyond the Ridge is a beautiful, comforting, simple book for children of all ages who have experienced the loss of a loved one. This story encourages children to regard death as a process of adventure into greater territory than our bodies can permit.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Beyond Words Gayle A. Huntress This story is a personal account of a girl who loses both parents to cancer. It chronicles the family’s heartbreaking loss, the redemptive power of lofe and the community that helped them on their grief journey. Children and Grief: An Overview of Children’s Grief VITAS The booklet discusses the different concepts of death and common grief reactions of children at various ages as well as more complicated reactions that may warrant seeking professional help. Children Die, Too Joy & Mary Johnson This comforting booklet offers insights and information to help parents deal with sadness, guilt, the needs of their children, and other feelings when a child dies. Chill and Spill: A Place to Put It Down and Work It Out Jeanean Jacobs & Steffanie Lorig You'll discover a cool combination of writing and drawing exercises that will help you explore what’s going on inside of your head and your heart. Coping with the Death of a Brother or Sister Ruth Ruiz The Death of a Brother or Sister does not candy coat the challenges of this great loss, but it does make clear inroads into normalizing the grief experience as it may be felt by siblings and parents. Dancing on the Edge Kit Bakke After her mother’s sudden death, twelve year-old Dot finds herself in shock as her world has changed. She accompanies her aunt to a trip to England where she learns about her past, learns more about her mother, and processes her grief. Deconstruction/Reconstruction The Dougy Center Whether a teen has experienced the death of a parent, sibling, grandparent, close friend, or other family member, this Deconstruction/Reconstruction journal is an advice-free place where teens can draw, write, paint, and transform whatever they're thinking and feeling. Dusty Was My Friend Andrea Clardy This is a great recourse for children who have lost a friend. Andrea tells the story of eight-year-old Benjamin remembering his friend Dusty and tries to understand his own feelings about losing a friend in this way. Empty Room: Surviving the Loss of a Brother or Sister at Any Age Elizabeth DeVita-Raeburn In telling her own story, as well as the stories of those she interviewed for the book, DeVita-Raeburn draws us into the experience of both children and adults who have lost a brother or sister. Sibling loss continues to go unrecognized as the potentially life-changing event that it is. This book acknowledges that pain and will help survivors begin to heal. Everett Anderson’s Goodbye Lucille Clifton A young African American boy struggles to understand and accept his father’s death. With the help of his mother, he remembers that love never dies, and his father will live in his memory.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close Jonathan Foer When his father dies in the World Trade Center collapse, Oskar shifts his boundless energy to a quest for answers. Facing Change: Falling Apart and Coming Together Again in the Teen Years Donna O’Toole Founded on the belief that young adults can make effective choices that can transform pain into resilience, the author provides an abundance of information and coping choices to assist the process. Facing Change is a book about loss, change, and possibilities. Fatherloss: How Sons of All Ages Come to Terms with the Death of Their Dads Neil Chethik Shows how losing a father brings challenge and loss but can also be a foundation of heartiness, liberty, and hope. Fernside: Supporting Children and Families Through Grief, Giving Grief Form Christi Kettman A collection of art by grieving children and teens at Fernside. Fire in My Heart, Ice in My Veins Enid Samuel-Traisman This journal is to help teens process their emotions and their grief journey. The pages include different journaling prompts about various emotions and types of support. Forever Remembered Marcia Woodard & Dan Zadra The beautiful and inspiring message in this book reminds us that, regardless of fame or fortune, grief inevitably touches each of our lives. Gracefully Gone Alicia Coppola Written in journal format, Gracefully Gone is a story about a father and daughter’s journey through the diagnosis and battle of cancer. Alicia and her father both share their perspective on this difficult journey, memories, and their love. Great Answers to Difficult Questions Linda Goldman This book explores children’s thoughts and feelings on the subject of death and provides parents and other caring adults with guidance on how to respond to difficult questions. Grief’s Courageous Journey: A Workbook Sandi Caplan & Gordon Lang This well-conceived journal/workbook is a guide for those grieving the loss of a loved one. It provides a compassionate program of steps to take for coping with day-to-day life and accepting change. Grieving: A Beginner’s Guide Jerusha Hull McCormack McCormack—widowed while her children were still young—writes a clear-eyed account of the many emotions and situations a grieving person may encounter. Healing and Growing Through Grief Donna O’Toole Helps us understand grief as a natural healing process and how to find help and support. Healing Your Grieving Heart for Teens Alan Wolfelt These ideas and activities are aimed at reducing the confusion, anxiety, and huge personal void so that the living can begin their lives again.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Heaven’s Child Caroline Flohr Told through the eyes and heart of Sarah’s mother, Heaven’s Child is a memoir about the death of sixteen-year-old twin daughter Sarah and how her immediate family members face grief, longing, and rebuilding. As an intimate self-examination, this true story tackles deep questions around life, death, and social issues. Help for the Hard Times Earl Hipp This helpful book offers entertainment, lightheartedness, and information all rolled into one great read. Cartoons, quotes, and line drawings take youth on a hopeful and entertaining journey through the many losses and challenges of teen life. Holiday Hope: Remembering Loved Ones During Special Times of the Year Fairview Press More than a dozen experts—therapists, clergy, and counselors—have written short essays filled with practical tips and proven techniques for handling grief. How It Feels When a Parent Dies J. Krementz Eighteen children from age 7–17, speak openly of their experiences and feelings. As they speak, we see them in photos with their surviving parent and with other family members, in the midst of their everyday lives. Homemade Books to Help Kids Cope Robert Ziegler This immensely helpful book gives techniques and instructions to help children make their very own storybooks, and offers an effective and creative way to help kids deal with loss. Honoring the Memory: When Death Happens Jim Boulden Thought-provoking questions, sensitive advice, and comforting quotes invite the reader to write responses in the spaces provided. How Do We Tell Children? Dan Schaefer & Christine Lyons This classic guide has been updated to help parents and children deal with traumatic events. It includes age specific information for a variety of circumstances, a crisis checklist, and resource pages. How It Feels When a Parent Dies Jill Kremetz Children speak openly of their experiences and feelings concerning death and grief. How to Go on Living When Someone You Loves Dies Therese Rando There is no right or wrong way to grieve; each person’s response to loss will be different. In this compassionate, comprehensive guide, you are led gently through the painful but necessary process of grieving. This guide also helps you find the best way for yourself. How Will I Get Through the Holidays? James Miller Miller presents twelve reassuring thoughts to help people of all ages through holidays after the loss of a loved one. Consoling quotations and suggestions serve as a guide and companion for any significant occasion.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org If Only Carole Geithner If Only follows the story of 13 year-old Corinna and her grief journey after her mom dies from cancer. Corinna navigates through the first day of school, Mother’s day, 8th grade, friends, and boys. This moving and sometimes humorous story helps open difficult conversations in families about grief. I Remember, I Remember Enid Samuel Traisman This book provides a place for your thoughts after a loved one dies. With pages to reflect memories and shared events, you create a keepsake to be shared with others. Comforting quotes and suggestions are given throughout. I Will Never Forget You: A Teen Journal of Love and Remembrance Emilio Parga A journal designed to help teens articulate their feelings in the grieving process. I Will Remember You: A Guidebook Through Grief for Teens Laura Dower Just as death is a part of life, grieving is a part of living. For teens, this can be a particularly painful lesson to learn. This book is an inspirational and accessible guide to coping with loss. It includes personal stories of death and life from real teens, advice from a renowned grief counselor, and dozens of hands-on creative exercises to help teens move through their pain and sorrow into tomorrow. It Is OK to Feel Sad! Margaret Collins Engaging games and stories help very young children understand grief and the other emotions they may face when someone dies. This book includes an age- appropriate memory page, which can be filled in with a picture and special thoughts and features many helpful suggestions for adults on how to talk about death with small children. Life After Loss: Conquering Grief and Finding Hope Raymond A. Moody This resource allows the reader to use the process of grief, loss, or bereavement in a positive manner and offers pointers on how to offer or receive sympathy. Written from personal insight and experience, the author incorporates stories of others dealing with grief or loss. Living with Grief: Children, Adolescents and Loss K. Doka Images of sobbing teens being led away from shootings are burned in our memories. The 19 chapters in this book address the impact of loss on our children, and the nation’s consciousness. Articles by the nation’s leading thanatologists and grief counselors on grief and bereavement in children and adolescents are interspersed with articles by children who have experienced tragic loss. Looking for Alaska John Green Miles, Chip, and Alaska form a inseparable friendship at boarding school. In addition to their adventures, the three of them navigate death, guilt, and grief together.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Losing Someone You Love: When a Brother or Sister Dies E. Richter Sixteen young people between the ages of 10 and 24 recall siblings they loved and express their loss. They describe their own feelings and reactions and the outside pressures that accompany the death of their sibling, sharing their experiences so that others who experience the same loss will not feel alone. Love and Remembrance Margot Kenefick Burkle With this very special memory book, parents, siblings, grandparents, and others can record and keep sacred the special memories of a child who is loved and is not forgotten. Memorial Rituals Book for Healing and Hope Ann Putter Putter gives us a bounty of creative ideas from her many years of experience in using ceremony and ritual as a vital part of grief group experiences. Mick Harte Was Here Barbara Park This heart-wrenching novel weaves together diverting anecdotes about the author’s endearingly eccentric brother with her reactions, and those of her parents, to his death in a bicycle accident at the age of 12. Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss H. Edelman Edelman shares her own painful story and the stories of many other women who, as children or adults, lost their mothers. She explains the stages of grief and adjustment. She considers the secondary effects that can occur: the girl-child filling the lost mother's role at home for father and younger siblings. If you’ve lost your mother, you no longer have to face it alone. My Father’s Heart: A Son’s Reckoning with the Legacy of Heart Disease Steve McKee My Father’s Heart is an extraordinary story of an all-too-ordinary scenario: A father dies, a son remains, and the loss casts a long shadow across a generation. My Life Changed: A Journal for Coping with Loss and Grief Amy, Allie & David Dennison When their father died suddenly, the three young people created this journal so that others could safely draw out and write down hard-to-talk-about feelings. They include questions to help get started. By preteens for their peers. My Lifetime Book Larry Good This carefully planned journal will help you write the life story of yourself or a loved one. Its loose-leaf binder format allows for adding pages and customizing as desired for a permanent legacy or memory book. No Child Should Grieve Alone: A Guide for Parents, Caregivers, and Professionals Emilio Parga, M.A. This book offers a wealth of valuable resources for children and adolescents who have experienced a loss, as well as for their parents, teachers, counselors, and other caregivers.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Nobody’s Child Anymore: Grieving, Caring and Comforting When Parents Die Barbara Bartocci Nobody’s Child Anymore is an immensely helpful and comforting resource for anyone caring for a dying parent, mourning the loss, caring for the remaining parent, and seeking new meaning beyond grief. The author shares her own experience and the thoughts and experiences of others as a source to ease your soul pain. On Children and Death Elisabeth Kubler-Ross This compassionate book offers the families of dead and dying children the help and hope they need to survive. On Grief and Grieving: Finding the Meaning of Grief Through the Five Stages of Loss Elisabeth Kubler-Ross & David Kessler On Grief and Grieving applies the stages of loss to the process of grieving and weaves together theory, inspiration, and practical advice. It includes sections on sadness, hauntings, dreams, coping, children, healing, isolation, and even the subject of sex during grief. Orphaned Adult: Understanding and Coping with Grief and Change After the Death of Our Parents Alexander Levy Incorporating his own personal experience with the accounts of others who have lost their parents, psychologist Levy examines this profound life-changing event with compassion and understanding. Part of Me Died Too: Stories of Creative Survival Among Bereaved Children and Teenagers Virginia Lynn Fry & Katherine Paterson These young people used writing, drawing, games of safe aggression, farewell projects, rituals, and other creative activities to bring their feelings into the open, to explore them, and to heal and feel whole. Pieces of Georgia Jen Bryant Georgia shares all aspects of her life and thoughts, and readers come to understand the depth of her loss. Their story is a universal one of love, friendship, and loss. Rachel and the Upside Down Heart E. Douglas A true story of how Rachel rediscovers happiness while keeping the memory of her father alive in her heart. Real Men Do Cry Eric Hipple Real Men Do Cry, by former NFL quarterback Eric Hipple, is an incredible story of tragedy and triumph. Recovering from the Loss of a Parent K. Donnelly However you choose to cope—through private, inner searching, or sharing your feelings with others—this book is a companion through the process of understanding and accepting your loss.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Recovering from the Loss of a Sibling K. Donnelly A book of hope and healing, Recovering from the Loss of a Sibling is the first book for those who have experienced the death of a brother or sister. When a brother or sister dies, surviving siblings may receive little support or even recognition of their pain. Parents are so grief-stricken at the loss of a child that they often find themselves unable to cope with the needs of their surviving children. With family and friends concentrating on the parent’s tragedy, the suffering of siblings often goes unnoticed. Remembering with Love Elisabeth Levang & Sherokee Ilse Here is a poignant, insightful, and inspirational collection of more than 300 short pieces that are messages of hope to bereaved persons. They remind us that hope is possible while traveling the journey through grief. Renewing Your Spirit: A Guide for Holidays and Special Days Sherry Williams The author provides sound advice to help make sense of confusing holiday feelings after a loved one dies. Special emphasis is given to rituals and ceremonies. Guided journaling exercises help clarify expectations and wishes, and give reminders for self-care. Rubber Houses Ellen Yeomans (Fiction) Kit must find a way to own her grief to mourn Buddy while at the same time joyfully celebrate the characteristics and quirks that constituted his presence in her life. Sibling Grief: Healing After the Death of a Brother or Sister P. Gill White White combines extensive clinical experience with wisdom from hundreds of bereaved siblings at every age to create this moving, very readable guide. Sorry You’re Lost Matt Blackstone When seventh grader Denny “Donuts” Murphy’s mother dies, he becomes the world’s biggest class clown. But deep down, Denny just wants to return to a time when his mom is still alive and where his dad doesn’t sit in front of a TV all day. This chapter book is told from the perspective of Denny as he navigates his grief, the death of his mom, and middle school. Straight Talk About Death for Teenagers Earl A. Grollman Grollman offers advice and answers the kinds of questions that teens are likely to ask themselves when grieving the death of someone close. Surviving the Death of a Sibling: Living Through Grief When an Adult Brother or Sister Dies T. J. Wray Wray is a captivating storyteller who weaves stories of herself and many other sibling grievers to bring clarity and understanding to the complex process of sibling grief. This book is insightful, consoling, and filled with helpful, proactive steps designed to help surviving siblings cope with their devastating loss.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org Tear Soup – A Recipe for Healing After Loss Pat Schweibert Tear Soup recognizes that every member of the family from the youngest to the oldest will grieve in their own way. By emphasizing the individual process of bereavement by making soup, Tear Soup brings a warm and comfortable feeling to an otherwise difficult subject matter for many individuals. Teenagers Face to Face with Bereavement C. Haskins & K. Gravelle Gravelle and Haskins asked 17 teens, all of whom have lost a relative or a close friend, to tell their stories. These responses are discussed at length from the points of view of teens and counselors, as are difficult situations which may follow a death: overprotective parents who fear another loss; observance of significant anniversaries; whether and how to tell new friends about what happened; fear of risking new relationships; reluctance to leave home to attend college. The young people speak honestly and earnestly, offering coping strategies that worked for them. Both interviewees and compilers offer hope and comfort. Teens Write Through It: Essays from Teens Who Have Triumphed Over Trouble Faiview Press Staff This collection contains essays about young people’s real experiences and the challenges they have faced. One 16-year- old writes on how her parents’ divorce affected her; another writes on the strength her family had to have when her father died in a car accident. The Fault in Our Stars John Green The Fault in Our Stars follows a young teenage girl who has been diagnosed with lung cancer and attends a cancer support group. After she befriends another young teenage boy at the support group, together the two of them explore life and death. The Grieving Teen H. Fitzgerald The Grieving Teen is written specifically for teenagers. Fitzgerald, an expert in grief counseling and the author of The Mourning Handbook, communicates the issues clearly without oversimplifying or resorting to “teenspeak.” Chapters consist of typical questions that young adults may have about grief, followed by a What You Can Do section. The Healing Book: Facing the Death— and Celebrating the Life of Someone You Love Ellen Sabin Interactive book designed for children and families dealing with loss. The Heart of Grief Thomas Attig This book gives heartfelt descriptions, through many real-life stories, of how people have faced loss without losing connection. Attig shows how grief can be a transition from loving in the presence to loving in the absence. The Kid’s Book About Death and Dying Eric Rofes This book about death and dying covers a wide range of subtopics, including learning to talk about death, death of a pet, death of children, and “is there life after death?”  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org The Power to Prevent Suicide: A Guide for Helping Teens J. Galas & R. Nelson An excellent, practical manual that is easy to read and understand. The authors’ premise is that, as trusted and caring friends, teens have a special role in the prevention of suicide among their peers and discuss what to do if they observe the danger signals. This Star Won’t Go Out Esther Earl, with Lori and Wayne Earl This Star Won’t Go Out is a memoir about Esther and her journey with cancer and dealing with death. Esther was diagnosed with thyroid cancer at age twelve. This book is filled with Esther’s journal, sketches, pictures, fiction, and letters, as well as the photographs and letters from Esther’s family and friends who help to tell her story. Thoughts for the Holidays: Finding Permission to Grieve Doug Manning We learn to give ourselves permission to change traditions, choose safe people, and be ourselves where we are. Threads of Hope: An Offering for Those Who Grieve Beth Rotondo Experiencing grief is often isolating and overwhelming and yet the majority of us have lost someone we deeply love. Threads of Hope offers those who grieve a framework to express our questions and thoughts as well as the author’s understanding of the grief process. Grief renders unimaginable pain but also offers us the miracle of hope. Weird Is Normal When Teenagers Grieve Jenny Lee Wheeler Like you, Jenny Wheeler has experienced and is still experiencing the challenges of how to grieve in an adult world filled with unrealistic expectations. In this book, Jenny walks the reader through the different aspects of grief. What Will Help Me? How Can I Help? James Miller Offers 12 things to remember when you have suffered a loss. Also, has 12 things to do when someone you know suffers a loss. When Death Walks In Mark Scrivani A guide for teenagers facing grief that discuss the grief journey and different emotions one might experience with grief. When Parents Die: Learning to Live with the Loss of a Parent R. Abrams This new edition considers in more depth the continuing importance of the deceased parent in one’s life, the critical role played by the surviving parent, and the experiences of younger children, as well as the impact of other types of loss such as divorce and adoption. Drawing on new research undertaken on bereavement, especially in the area of “grief work,” When Parents Die is a direct and sympathetic book that will speak to all readers concerned with coping with parental loss. When Teens Are Grieving Quality of Life Publishing Written by teens for teens, this is a guide booklet to understanding loss and grief. When You Grieve From A to Z Ginny Limer This book uses illustrations, alliterations, and reflection questions to guide the reader on a creative grief journey through their emotions. Readers can color, journal, and draw.  National Bereavement Resource Guide Books © Eluna 2019 www.achildingrief.com elunanetwork.org You Are Not Alone: Teens Talk About Life After the Loss of a Parent L. Hughes The author believes that sharing experiences about losing a parent begins the healing process. Her purpose in writing the book is to let teens know that they don’t have to feel isolated—there is help available for them.